Why do we grieve the dead?
I'm having the time of my life. Because I'm in the process of saving money I have been staying at home with the internet and computer being my only to the outside world. Staying home to watch TV shows or to play games has never given me as much satisfaction as it has now. Because I no longer have any responsibilities, I do not have the responsibility to do anything at all, and games are a way to fill out my time rather to waste time. Granted I have been reading books as well and trying to push forward my university applications, but that's minimal time spent relative to the time I have.
However while I am having fun many others are not. Unfortunately the father of an old friend of mine has passed on at a very young age of 48 due to a stroke, and lately they have been always on my mind. I can't imagine what it would be like to lose someone at such a young age, and at such a crucial time period in your life (my friend is in her teenage years).
Today was the day of wake. I did not see any body, for it was fully enclosed within the coffin. Everywhere I looked there were people crying and there were people trying to lighten the mood at the same time, only to fail.
I don't find myself to be a very emotional person, but I am able to read emotions very carefully and tend to follow the atmosphere that for today was very heavy. As such I found myself often unable to move, as if trapped in the prison of my mind. Motionless, my mind began to wonder, all the while looking at the coffin of a man that I once knew. Looking at the man that once would treat me out for food, take me out to ride horses and the man that would tell me stories of how his daughter came to be. I was very sad at the time, for those memories were already beginning to fade. I remember his face, his laugh, but I only met him a handful of times. How long would it be before I forget?
But still I find him talking to me, and I suppose one would only understand the feeling once it has occurred to you. Despite the few times I met him I can hear his voice clearly in my head "take care of my daughter". I suppose then the reason that I'm not in as much grief is not only because I didn't see him very often, but it was already because I don't really feel that he left. I like to think of death as a transition, rather than an end. It just shows a movement from reality to the afterlife, and I suppose that rather than grieving over the fact that he left, we should be happy that he had the chance to live and touch our lives in the first place.
Cheers,
Matthew Tan
However while I am having fun many others are not. Unfortunately the father of an old friend of mine has passed on at a very young age of 48 due to a stroke, and lately they have been always on my mind. I can't imagine what it would be like to lose someone at such a young age, and at such a crucial time period in your life (my friend is in her teenage years).
Today was the day of wake. I did not see any body, for it was fully enclosed within the coffin. Everywhere I looked there were people crying and there were people trying to lighten the mood at the same time, only to fail.
I don't find myself to be a very emotional person, but I am able to read emotions very carefully and tend to follow the atmosphere that for today was very heavy. As such I found myself often unable to move, as if trapped in the prison of my mind. Motionless, my mind began to wonder, all the while looking at the coffin of a man that I once knew. Looking at the man that once would treat me out for food, take me out to ride horses and the man that would tell me stories of how his daughter came to be. I was very sad at the time, for those memories were already beginning to fade. I remember his face, his laugh, but I only met him a handful of times. How long would it be before I forget?
But still I find him talking to me, and I suppose one would only understand the feeling once it has occurred to you. Despite the few times I met him I can hear his voice clearly in my head "take care of my daughter". I suppose then the reason that I'm not in as much grief is not only because I didn't see him very often, but it was already because I don't really feel that he left. I like to think of death as a transition, rather than an end. It just shows a movement from reality to the afterlife, and I suppose that rather than grieving over the fact that he left, we should be happy that he had the chance to live and touch our lives in the first place.
Cheers,
Matthew Tan
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