Progress in preparation of the next anniversary
My birthday falls on the next week of Tuesday and with it the anniversary of my blog, which turns 5 this year (I always have to review the date of which I first started this blog. It helps that it lies on the same date as my birthday so I merely have to check the year it was produced). As such I think it would be a good idea to review all the things that have went wrong and right within this year. To be perfectly honest, I do think that little has went my way this year from the very start, for personal reasons that I do not wish to in addition to things that I will go into within this blog post.
First of all is my lack of commitment to this blog. As much as I blame my national service and as much as it is a hinderance to my personal life, I do believe that I could have committed a lot more to not only my blogs but also to my personal writings so as to properly log my days as they went by. I could have committed more such that I could have produced better quality posts, especially ones about current affairs that I got so used to uploading before this year. I also believe that I could have written a bit more in frequency, if I could muster up the time to be able to sit down and write about my experiences. I do believe that it is good to log in my thoughts, even as good or bad as they may be.
Secondly, if you are close enough to know me personally, you would have known that I met and separated from my girlfriend this year in a very short relationship. Although they do bring back memories that still sting, I believe that this was good for my personal well being. Being with her raised my self-esteem and allowed me to look at what I really wanted within a relationship other than a partner to talk to. I have now feel more confident, and am now single by choice, something that I have not felt in a long time, even after breaking up with the girl before her. I am eternally grateful for the experience, as painful it may be. Finding the pain in breakups is painful, but I do believe that it is a good experience for me to go through. Nevertheless this makes it hard to classify this experience throughout the year as something I would have wanted to have.
Lastly, it was National Service itself. I would not have wanted to go through with it, but unfortunately as a Singaporean citizen I do not really have a choice. As smooth as it was for me (only in retrospect), I still do think that I would be more productive (strangely, healthier) and smarter academically for obvious reasons. There are many friends that I have made, and they do seem to be the only consolation for my term in National Service. I do hope to be with them till adult hood, and I do have the opportunity to meet them for the next ten years when we get recalled back for future army services.
I do expect next year to be better, but overall all I want is to get National Service done and over with, only then do I hope to collect the bits and pieces and slowly begin to work on them once more for future purposes.
Cheers,
Matthew Tan
First of all is my lack of commitment to this blog. As much as I blame my national service and as much as it is a hinderance to my personal life, I do believe that I could have committed a lot more to not only my blogs but also to my personal writings so as to properly log my days as they went by. I could have committed more such that I could have produced better quality posts, especially ones about current affairs that I got so used to uploading before this year. I also believe that I could have written a bit more in frequency, if I could muster up the time to be able to sit down and write about my experiences. I do believe that it is good to log in my thoughts, even as good or bad as they may be.
Secondly, if you are close enough to know me personally, you would have known that I met and separated from my girlfriend this year in a very short relationship. Although they do bring back memories that still sting, I believe that this was good for my personal well being. Being with her raised my self-esteem and allowed me to look at what I really wanted within a relationship other than a partner to talk to. I have now feel more confident, and am now single by choice, something that I have not felt in a long time, even after breaking up with the girl before her. I am eternally grateful for the experience, as painful it may be. Finding the pain in breakups is painful, but I do believe that it is a good experience for me to go through. Nevertheless this makes it hard to classify this experience throughout the year as something I would have wanted to have.
Lastly, it was National Service itself. I would not have wanted to go through with it, but unfortunately as a Singaporean citizen I do not really have a choice. As smooth as it was for me (only in retrospect), I still do think that I would be more productive (strangely, healthier) and smarter academically for obvious reasons. There are many friends that I have made, and they do seem to be the only consolation for my term in National Service. I do hope to be with them till adult hood, and I do have the opportunity to meet them for the next ten years when we get recalled back for future army services.
I do expect next year to be better, but overall all I want is to get National Service done and over with, only then do I hope to collect the bits and pieces and slowly begin to work on them once more for future purposes.
Cheers,
Matthew Tan
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