Friendship
Friendship is not really an easy thing to write about. As an international student I tend to enjoy friendships as they come about, but from experience many break just as easy as they come. Distance does nothing to strengthen a friendship, and as an international student where friendships come and go many tend to break. Many come back forgetting who you were altogether, and as times I do admit that I was at the giving end rather than at the receiving end, although both cases were equally embarrassing.
But coming back to a partially local school is more interesting. My school only allows 50% of the student population to be expatriates, and for once I was not considered one. I was among those who knew each other from a long time ago and have roots here. As a returning expatriate, I had little friends outside of school, let alone those who I found interesting. As a result I can still say here that there are few that I would actually call my close friends in comparison to the ones I had in Indonesia. I suppose that at the time, where I spent most of my teenage years in Indonesia and I felt like I grew up with many of my friends there. We were more expressive, and we didn't let anyone think about who or what we looked like to other people as long as we had each other. We were a team, and we always let everyone know. I suppose here in Singapore I didn't really have that sense of camaraderie, and there are times that I miss it. At other times I remind myself that I'm much more independent, and changes that I make now are up to me to push, not for others.
I lost touch with many of them, but they are still so that I would call them my friends. Although we don't talk to each other very much, I still would give up some time to hang out with them whenever they popped by to visit, although with much less familiarity than I would have liked, but they are friends nonetheless, and I suppose we would still look out for each other no matter what part of the world we are in. On paper we are friends, but emotionally we will never be like the friends we once were.
At the end of the day, I believe that friendship, like any relationship, requires effort and commitment to keep strong, and there are only a select few I wish to invest so much time to maintain. Whether long distance or just for a friend next door, any friendship that you put effort in is definitely worth saving. I suppose I am writing this to myself one day had I the chance to read through my blogs again, to never give up on your friends, especially the ones worth having.
Cheers,
Matthew Tan
But coming back to a partially local school is more interesting. My school only allows 50% of the student population to be expatriates, and for once I was not considered one. I was among those who knew each other from a long time ago and have roots here. As a returning expatriate, I had little friends outside of school, let alone those who I found interesting. As a result I can still say here that there are few that I would actually call my close friends in comparison to the ones I had in Indonesia. I suppose that at the time, where I spent most of my teenage years in Indonesia and I felt like I grew up with many of my friends there. We were more expressive, and we didn't let anyone think about who or what we looked like to other people as long as we had each other. We were a team, and we always let everyone know. I suppose here in Singapore I didn't really have that sense of camaraderie, and there are times that I miss it. At other times I remind myself that I'm much more independent, and changes that I make now are up to me to push, not for others.
I lost touch with many of them, but they are still so that I would call them my friends. Although we don't talk to each other very much, I still would give up some time to hang out with them whenever they popped by to visit, although with much less familiarity than I would have liked, but they are friends nonetheless, and I suppose we would still look out for each other no matter what part of the world we are in. On paper we are friends, but emotionally we will never be like the friends we once were.
At the end of the day, I believe that friendship, like any relationship, requires effort and commitment to keep strong, and there are only a select few I wish to invest so much time to maintain. Whether long distance or just for a friend next door, any friendship that you put effort in is definitely worth saving. I suppose I am writing this to myself one day had I the chance to read through my blogs again, to never give up on your friends, especially the ones worth having.
Cheers,
Matthew Tan
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